Wednesday, March 27, 2013

7

Well, it's been about a hundred years since I've written about anything besides my kid having a cancer issue or my baby having her organs put back in or anything else medical related. Soooo  I thought I'd kick off the new season with some fun that's happening in Weir,Tx.
Last summer Marck and I read a thought provoking life altering book. 7. You can Google the book, Jen Hatmaker is the author but basically the author tackles 7 areas of excess in our culture, tries to focus on God, and deals with poverty. Totally just gave you the nutshell version and yes it does not sound interesting from the way I just described it. Trust me, after you read this post, if you hang in til the end, drop everything and go get the book. If you have a soul you'll hate me for telling you about it, her for even having the nerve to write it, but in the end you'll thank us both.
I'm in a bible study group now that is tackling this challenge, although as the author does the experiment for a month, we are doing it for a blessed 7 days. Thank you Jesus! I like my cushy perks of living in the U.S.
Many of my friends have asked, " how'd you do with the food??". I'm sure they are overly interested on account of the fact that I'm vegan now, which by all rights according to our current culture IS a mutiny in itself. So here goes how the food went, and how on day 1 my clothing mutiny is going.
Food- The author recommends picking 7 food items for the week. SEVEN. THAT'S IT!!! Ok, easy peasy, I got this. My goodness I hardly eat much any way right?? True, however I did not take into account I have 5 kids, 4 of which I home school, one I'm nursing and trying the whole solids thing, ( BTW- Selah has the 7 things down, sister keeps hers at a 3, boob, bananas and squash.), plus I cut hair a bunch at home soooo all these factors were less than helpful in eating only 7 things for a week. It really takes a lot of planning and forethought both of which I couldn't muster up the strength to do. By Thursday. evening I was "cheating" and by Friday I took my freedom in Christ and called it quits. Incidentally we started Wednesday. Calling that an epic fail, did not grow close to Jesus, did not feel a sacrifice, did experiment very badly.
Clothes- Going along with the theme you may have guessed we chose 7 items of clothes to wear for a week. No biggie I think, I'm not the clothes horse Marck Weir is. Oh really? hmmm, did I forget to mention it's EASTER WEEK??? Crappity crap. Apparently I like to look at least put together for church, at best look fab and say airy things like, " oh I just grabbed this frock and tossed it on. You know how tough it can be to get 7 people ready for church!". *** all the while hoping they are whispering, " she looks amazing for having 5 kids" as I stroll away***
Ok so back to my choices...
Really tricky. Have I mentioned my hatred for cold weather? And when I say cold I mean 60 or cooler?? It might crack 70 today. Here are my breezily picked choices and then I'll spill the nitty gritty;
1 pair of jeans
1 pair of yoga pants
1 baseball mom t-shirt ( Canon's first ball game is saturday, gotta represent)
1 pink t-shirt
1 long sleeve black shirt
1 zip up sweat shirt
and my running shoes

At first I wasn't going to count pj's or my shoes and least of all my precious slippers. I mean come on, I told you clothes don't have a grip on me... Pardon me ma'am but isn't a fast supposed to pinch? Aren't you trying to get perspective about how the rest of the world is living in squallier and poverty? Ok fine, no slippers. Then I get this dumb text from my dumb friend who gave me the dumb book in the first place. By the way, after reading the first chapter last summer, I texted said friend and told her I hated her for giving me the book. She already knows our friendship is in the balance right now. :-) So the text this morning says this " As I was thinking it over I realized that even jammies is sort of a rich person privilege. I think I might do what she (the author) did and sleep in my t's".  Who needs lofty friends like this anyway?? Where are my shallow friends when I need them?? Then another super spiritual text from another friend, " I'm giving up my beloved house slippers which I wear every waking moment"... wait hold up, she gave up her slippers?? Ok fine for her, but I don't feel God calling me to do that.... Later same friend says, " My cold bare feet this morning led me to pray for the homeless that always feel the elements".
** Jen Weir raises hand at bible study next week to ask " can I move to a more shallow and selfish table please?"**
People all morning these ladies keep going!!
Another " And let's remember to give thanks and praise that we are privileged and we do have slippers and pjs and the option to wear them or not. We need to give thanks for our many blessings. Be humbled by them."
The texting went on all morning. Much laughter ensued on my end because while these precious women were quite grounded in their ideas and thougths, they still struggled like me in their First World-ness.
ie- "Went to the mall to in my gym clothes, didn't want to waste an outfit on a silly errand" HAHA!! Right on sister! Another funny- " Ah man! Already got my jeans dirty! Day1"
ps- same girl is not going to wash her clothes to gain more perspective.

As I have prayed through this study, I do want a perspective shift. I am coming off what I like to call my hurricane. A kid with cancer one year, 2 years later a kid born with her liver on the outside of her body. All of which turned out ok. During that Hurricane season, my faith was FIERCE. Jesus and me were tight. I knew that I knew my strength was in Him and Him alone. Season over, everyone is healthy, life has resumed some what normally, and I'm left in aftermath mode. Cleaning up of my once raw emotions. Dealing with fears rooted so deep from having not one but two kids with health issues. Fears people. I can not feel a twinge in my body or see a mole on another kid and not think it's cancer. Where's your faith Jen Weir??
Friends, I have no idea. My faith is dryer than dry. I love the Lord, pray daily, seek Him and all that. I just feel stuck.
Mad.
A lot scared.
Scared mostly of having to walk something even scarier than I have had to in the past 3 years.
So this fast of 7 means a lot more to me than getting perspective on the third world at large. I know how they live and I do want to help. I will. I'm getting there. But first I need to know my Jesus again. I need to be OK again.I'm praying that fasting this 7 weeks with allow that to happen.

Lest you think I have stayed in my bubble and not felt the pinch, I did take slippers off my list and  I will sleep in my yoga pants and t-shirt. But, I will wash my clothes... daily.